3 Fake Bitches

ITS A FAKE!! ITS A FAKE!!

If your wondering whats "fake" then I have really BIG news. . . . Paris Hilton has not one but TWO look alikes. ..

thats how she gets around to do all of her duties ... . .


One has been going to fashion week, another celebrating a birthday(the real one) and another shooting another reality show. . .
based on her life as the fake Paris Hilton.. .

I think the bitch is too smart to be a blonde. . and is ALL about milking this stereotypical world for ALL of its cash!!

LOVE YOU LONG TIME PARIS!!

Halle For Versace

She's looking professional. . .. not "acting" like a model . . no dead eyes . . but she could've went without the "wide mouth" shot. . overall very good. She could hit the runway. . . lets just hope she doesnt turn to coke for comfort.

Madonna's Face Job

LaRiza V.S. Madonna

Ok, So I'm beginning to think that Madonna had face surgery.. I don't know how many but she has had them. If you look at before and after picture..there is a difference in both of them. Guess no one in hollywood want to accept the wrinkles huh??

The song is off the hook. I really like Madonna...especially... the old school Madonna. That was my bitch. Now she's all aged up and grown as hell. I want to know exactly when do a woman stop dressing up soo umm what's the word? dressing in body suits. I thought those were out.

Madonna you look good but ummm I don't know.. I kinda of don't want to see your extra skin in your video. You're still a fucking great awesome , though...but cover up just a little bit. I rather have you dress up like you do in your Versace ads...(hope I'm right about the designer)
Well, folks those are my thoughts for the day until then see ya later (salutes)

NOTE FROM CAM:Even though this pic is a before and after "photoshopped" she still looks like she's a couple of appointments late on her face life.

Good Gwen, Bad Gwen

Gwen, I love her. . . . She's great in her own way. . I cant wait to here the next album. . I WISH she had someone else design L.A.MB. . . . but whatever. . (oooooh its her shit, its her shit) She looks great all the time, the best M.I.LF. i've ever saw.

. . EXCEPT FOR THE GRAMMYS . . She looks like she tripped and fell half way into someone's bong.

Skeletor???AGAIN!!??

Well, Lindsay is cool with me. . but in this pic???NO!!! She looks borderline Nicole Richie . .. I mean. . look at her shoulders ..Now her arms. .. See it?? . Kinda Anorexic right?? Since she recently got back with Wilma I think we're going to see a "happier version" of her. .

Cause we all know, Jared Leto almost made her a borderline dyke. .. I mean don't get me wrong, I KNOW Lindsay adores cock, but she was a bit butch towards the paparazi . . spitting at them, flippin them off. ..Come to think of it. . who's nice to those fags anyway?

Together Again

Paris and Nicole are reunited for the 4th season of the Simple Life: Til Death Do Us Part . Its been reported that the two didnt even look at each other. . Let alone shoot a scene or talk to each other. I guess this isnt an act after all .. . These bitches really are upset with each other.
And I honestly believe this season will be the MOST WATCHED SHOW FOR THE SUMMER . .

The "Hmmm . . ." Moment of The Day

Diddy and the openly gay fashion designer Zac Posen????

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm ... . .. . .

Its prolly nothing but friendship tide with business .. . . or maybe . . . they're just
BUTT BUDDIES!!!

lol

(I Bet I Can Make You Laugh)

Just stare at this picture . . and think about. . . The Grinch . . . The Joker . . . . and The Hulk. . ..


lol. I cant stop laugh'n, this bitch is MEGA-UGLY!!

tHANKS pEREZ FFOR THA PIC!!

Breaking News: Lil Kim Jail Time Reduced!!

Lil Kim (Queen Bee) jail time was originally suppose to end around the end of September, but because of "good behavior" it has been shaved down to June. . .

I'm soooo excited for her comeback! She has a T.V. show debuting on BET(yeah bitches) in March "Countdown to Lockdown".

Which shows Lil Kim 24/7 until her time to go. The promo looks hot, i'ma Lil Kim fan, so im gonna watch it.


YEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!!!!

Whats Tha Deal??

This bitch is on a WHOLE nother level . . Beefing with "Will Smith" "Nick Cannon" and "Ronald Isley"?? Its been reported that Bow Wow attended a dinner with his fellow label mates to celebrate those from the "1960's to 2006" . .

"he walked to up Ronald Isley and said .. "My album went gold in its first week, how many gold albums you got?"
Ronald Isley responed."I dont have any gold albums I have 37 platinum ones" J.D. walked up to BowWow as he tried to get "fresh" with the Isley, and said "Man, do you know who you talking to? whats up with you, lets go over here."

Thats right J.D., put that bitch in check before somebody else does. . . and another thing, just cuz you gotta grill doesn't make you a thug . . be a man bitch.

GhostWriter PT.3

Lariza A.K.A. "La" has sent me another post . . . After today, she will officially become part of the CVD Team. I have two more writers behind her that will have their stories released . .. by . . sunday I think . . Anyway, its gonna be hot . .

Lariza:Covers "The Good, Bad, and Ugly in the Music Industry"
TacBoone: Covers"Government BullSh*t"
KidMillionaire(AKA) CamVanDam "Covers "usual gossip, celeb rumours drama/Fashion"

We got another girl and a new guy on the team aswell, next week we shoudl kick everything off.

Anyway, here's La's latest story

"King"

Mr. T.I has a new album which is scheduled to hit March 28 followed by his first movie which will hit theaters March 31st.

All the T.I lovers including myself, go support the boy. He does wonderful things and he carry big things, if you know what I mean..Believe me, I felt that shit.

Check out his brand new song "What you know about that?". It's hot and he knows alot about that..Groupies let him go...

Thinking Smart . . . .

Halle Berry looks like she's "Finally" listening to us. . . she recently got a a "Razzie" award for her "sucking"(Not in Monster's Ball) CatWoman and she's seen here at Harvard accepting the "Woman of the Year" award.

And she took it like a pro, having a little fun with the crowd by writing "I will not make CatWoman 2" on a chalkboard.

and then. .

she became a total skank hoe . . sex'n it up with some freaky (white) Harvard student . . .I mean Its crazy, Just Look at our role model for young black girls "filling her self up" . . .

I dont like her anymore, she has lost a WHOLE lotta rank with me, seriously. I thought it was black history month . .

And I dont wanna come off as aMalcolm X or anything. . but . .is this picture a bit "racist" and "stereotypical"???

The "Hmmm . . ." Moment of the Day

Okay, Kanye did the "Jesus" cover for Rolling Stones like a couple of weeks ago right, well Mase did his own "Jesus" cover to a G-Unit mixtape called "10 Years of HATE" like a couple of months ago .. . Why hasnt anybody brought that to our attention? is Kanye bigger than a priest that raps about hoes,money,dope and killing?



Hmmmm . . .

Beyonce Goes for Small

She's losing a lot of weight . . but maintaing that booty . . Why can't J.lo accept her ass like Beyonce does???

Omahyra X-3

We all know that Omahyra Moto(Mota) is sexy ass hell, and she just wrapped up X-men 3. . . I wonder whats next for the triple threat(Modeling, Actress, Rockstar . . .. porn star????) . . If she tried to fuck a dude to death, im pretty sure she'd do porn . ..

Here are some screens of Omahyra in X-men 3 . . . . ..

OMG!!!

I hate it when, some geek dude post live pics of a gadget thats gonna be . . and has every red-blooded american on his and her's toe's . .

The Sidekick 3 has showed its beautiful ugly face on the web and has given me the biggest orgasm possible for a guy . . . . its sooo saad, its like not even cool.

Just look it. . . . .. I have nothing to say.

Sheeeeee'sss BAAAAAACCCCCCCKKKK PT.2

Omahyra Highlights FINE ASS HELL!! LOVE HER!!! HER WALK IS MEAN!!! NXT GEN MODEL!!

GhostWriters PT.2

Another editon of "CVD's GhostWritahz" wit my girl Lariza!!!! I think she's getting tha hang of things . . I think she's after my job yall . . . . anway here you go. . . .

"One fine motherfucker!!!

Terrence Howard is nominated for an oscar for Hustle and Flow (Great Movie).. How fucking awesome is that??

Finally, the man has a nomination.. It's about fucking time with his fine ass. I congratulate him on his looks and his talent.

The man is gorgeous and I'm on him like a fur coat. I will be not watching all of the Oscars cuz it's soo freaking boring..

Don't want to be pulling on my short jerry curled hair for hours watching this boring as show. But as soon as the category that his is in comes up.

I will be tuned like a motherfucka. Yea, Boy!! I'm Lariza and its been my fucking pleasure... Uno* "

Sheeeee'ssss BAAAAAACCCCCKKK!!

OMAHYRA, OMAHYRA, OMAHYRA!!!!!!!!! I have nothing to say . . . . .I have nothing to say . . . . .

Kelis (Again)

You can never be tired of the Queen of Milkshakes. . . Kelis. . Doesnt she look "Re-freshed"?Anyway, She was front row at Miss Sixty. . a "okay" brand that helped others kick off New York Fashion Week. . (which is a week that I will SOON dominate!)

Pearl

Her voice is "screeching" "powerful" sometimes even "haunting" .. I cant believe I never picked up any of her "Best of " cd's . .. In my eye's . .. she's the only one that can carry the name "Queen of Blue Eyed Soul/". She died from an overdose on Heroin . . .she was only 27 years old. . .

If you want to try something different .. something more "original" .. . something before MTV . . listen to Pearl by Janis Joplin. I dont know who's doing the reviews on cd's now-a-day . . I mean. . . they're comparing "Beyonce" to Tina Turner . . BEYONCE . . . to TINA F'N TURNER??!!! . . . .comparing Beyonce to the woman who picked cotton in Tennesse, the woman who got dirt dogged by her husband and learned voodoo to keep him off of her. . The woman who earned the title "First lady of Rock and Soul" . . . No way.. . not even close Beyonce.. . No where near it . . . .

Anyway . .check out Janis Joplin . .NOTE: If you own an Ipod and you download this song. . do not turn volume up to a %100 . . I blew the speakers out on my desktop . .Seriously. . .

Song that did the damage "Maybe" by Janis Joplin worth your speakers being blowed out.

Super Ugly

I just wanted to share that with you all . . I can not stand her!! uughhh!! just. . plain, old nasty. . . Looks like a fucking sheep dog blood hound Mut!!! uggh!

Hollaback Girl

She's BAAAAAAAAAAAAACCCCK!!!!

New LOOK
New ALBUM
New LEVEL

Sadly, Kelis's new album will NOT be produced by The Neptunes . .. I'm not even sure if she's on their label anymore. . .So, lets hope it sells and the Queen of Milkshake's goes Platinum wit this one!!!

$$$$DO NOT BOOTLEG. . THAT IS FOR LAME ASS LOSERS WHO CANT GET A DECENT JOB!!$$$$

GWG: Big Tigger

Here's another edition of Guess Who's Gay!!!!!!!

We all know who Karrine Steffans A.K.A. Super Head is right? Well, in a interview (which can be found at New York's own Hot.97 radio staion web page) Karrine tells another girl that Rapper/Host Big Tigger is gay . . The woman states:

"Karrine, tell them about the Big Tigg incident in Miami(Tiggs known hideout spot)
Tell them what you told me. . that you went to the hotel Tigg was staying at .. saw blood in the sheets . . and and you had sex with both Tigg and his "friend". . Describe the way you said that guys asshole looked. . . you said it was out, that it was open and out"

Now, I did paraphrase a lil bit, but it was something simlar to that .. . lol. anyway, check on that website to hear the whole thing. . Karrine get's threaten by her ex's new girl, gets caught in her lie and tells everyone listening that N.B.A. legend John Salley is hung like 2 horses! You gotta hear this interview!

From a look at this picture. . . . I'm starting to believe Karrine's sotry. . .that silly bitch. I cant believe Tigger would do something like this. . . lol.

Queen Bitch

I found the last photo shoot Lil Kim did before she went to jail. . .~tear~ . . Its for Dolce and Gabbana . . .

How hot is she riighhtt???? She really is beautiful and she even looks like the Ol' Skool Kim. . . .I missed that Lil Kim.. . .

Beyonce Carter

Is Jay-z throwing hits at us fans about him and Beyonce's relationship??? hmmmmm .. the Beyonce S. Carter sneaker will be coming out real sooooon . . . Hopefully by then Beyonce would have said "YES" to Jay-z and really becomes his Bonnie to his Clyde .. .

I wonder why she's sooo fucking nervous about getting married.. . ??? dare I say .. Les .. . . .B . .. .Naaaaaah. . Thats not it, i mean . . if she was Queen Latifah then YEAH, she would be. . . .but not Beyonce. . .

I give her 4 more months and we will find out FOR SURE if she's leaving Jay-z for someone else. . . .

Its Real

I thought tha bitch was lying . . . but she really is pregnant by Tom Cruise . . i mean damn, I always thought Tom was "Bi" . . or just straight up "gay" . . . But im still on the fence with him . . . they didnt get married like a "traditional" Celeb -couple. . . nor did they end past relationships on a "hella-fied" ending. . . . so .. . I think he's faking the front. .. i'll give him 2 years and he'll be boning a guy he met while shopping while Target.

Serena Lookin Good

I gotta say, the girl CAN dress when she wanna, but when she's not trying to look good. . . "shes really not trying to look good". lol.

Hence the name "Jolly Green Giant". . . . .
http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d128/camvandam5/serena_green_thumb.jpg.

MOOOORiah!!

Tha bitch is getting bigger everytime I see her, check out those legs. .. she needs to get it smoothed out. . .

even on the "Dont forget about us" video, her body looked "confused" . . Shit, Mariah looked "confused" . .

Like she's trying to decided whether or not she should be happy or sad or sum shit. . . .. Tha bitch is crazy, and getting fat. . . She needs to stick with the Prozac . .

Tyra Likes It Natural

Check Out Tyra's pits . . . the only natural hair she's got . . cuz you know she's like a shaved chicken "down stairs" and is NOTORIOUS for her fake weaves .. .

Major (Future) Updates!

I gotta Major Update coming up this Thursday . . maybe before then . . who knows . . . so, yeah . . do whatcha do best CHECK OUT THA ARCHIVES!!! I'll be back on thursday with more drama,gossip, and bitching!!

Also, I will have (2) new "GhostWritahz" talking bout. . what eva tha fuck they want. . . So, i'll catch yall then, holla back.

There is a GAAWWWD!! pt.2

Nicole Richie has parted ways from her druggie (boy) friend Steve-o. . . ."I called her like 3 hours ago, and usually she would have been returned my calls but she hasn't". Steve-O is coming off really strong as a "psycho killer stalker" and hopefully Nicole can have her daddy pay the LAPD to lock his punk ass up . . .

Don't Try and Hide It

Jello. . Ms. J.Lo . . .

Now, since "Hollywood" has gon all "Hollyhood" with the ass surgeries . . .Lip injections . . . . interacial flings . . ..and sudden "pop" influenced Hip Hop t.v. shows. . . I can now say we are officially one . . no more gay ass separation of the races, we are as together as Eddie Murphy and Johnny Gill.

Crabby

What the fuck was Patti LaBelle thinking about when she put on this outfit??

Patti LaBelle: "Hmmm child . . . I think I want to wear the red one honey . .

Stylist: But .. but Ms. LaBelle. . you'll look like a giant, red, cra-

Patti LaBelle: DIVA! Now, put it on me darling. . before I fire your ass . . and then you'll be . OOOWWWNN YOOURRR OWWNNN!!!!!